Romeo Romeo Where Art There Romeo

My husband and I went to Shakespeare in the park last night. It is a free production that our city does each year. It is very professionally done. I have wanted for several years to go to one of the productions. I was just afraid to ask my husband knowing that is not something that he would really enjoy.

This past Friday, I called him at work and said, "honey, do you want to go to the Shakespeare in the park this coming Wednesday?" His response was, "Are you asking, do I want to go and see the play or are you asking, do I want to go with you somewhere that you will enjoy?"

Hmmm.... I have never thought about how I ask questions to my husband. I knew the answer to the first question without a doubt, and really I knew that he would go with me to the play if I wanted to go. But his response showed me his heart. No, he really didn't want to go to the play but if it was with me, he would enjoy it. No he didn't want to go sit and swat bugs in a park but if I wanted him there he would go.

The way we ask our spouse questions is very important I have learned. I changed my question and asked him, "honey, do you want to go with me to Central Park and see Romeo and Juliet?" He response was, "I would love to spend time with you on Wednesday." The difference is, I know that he is not being pulled to the play against his will but he is wanting to spend time with me regardless of where we are at. My enjoyment will be watching the play with my husband and his enjoyment will be hanging out with me while having to watch a play. Both are fine and both fulfill each desire while not feeling like you have been made to do something.

The night was wonderful. We sat under the stars watching Romeo and Juliet, holding hands, laughing together and just enjoying one another. I knew he didn't really want to be there but how special it was to know that even if he would have been more comfortable at a sporting event, he loved me enough to come and share a time with me that I loved. That is romantic.

My challenge to you is to evaluate the way you ask your spouse questions and how you answer to their questions. Step out of your comfort zone and do things with your spouse not because you enjoy the event but just because you are doing it with them.